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Here are my first five thoughts that come to mind: 1.Don’t take it personally: We often assume that a partner’s down demeanor is because of us. Depression and anxiety can be either situational or biological but we are never the sole cause of either symptomatology. Crying and hyperventilating on a park bench for no reason apparent to anyone but you realllllly gets those dicks up! One minute, you're having a great date at a free outdoor concert, and the next minute, your heart is pounding and you feel like you are trapped in a Ziploc bag. "Playing it cool" is straight-up not in your repertoire. There's gotta be a country where "sitting at a bar staring into space and inevitably sweat-staining the pits of your expensive Madewell top while your brain moves 100 miles an hour" is considered playing it cool. Anyone familiar with benzos (that's an #INSIDER'S term for anxiety-alleviating tranquilizers) knows that they don't mix well with alcohol. Worst case scenario, you black out and wake up at the Formica table at an Arbys in another state. And you're so worried about whether they'll like you that you barely pay any attention to whether you like them. Every time a guy doesn't text you back in the early stages of dating you assume the worst and immediately go into crisis mode.

dating someone with depression and anxiety-81dating someone with depression and anxiety-66dating someone with depression and anxiety-15dating someone with depression and anxiety-78

Sometimes it can feel like the anxiety is a third person in the relationship, someone who wriggles in between you and your partner. No one prepared you for this, and you can’t choose who you fall for.

By understanding these issues and knowing how to respond, you can support the man you love without threatening the relationship or your emotional wellbeing.

Note: We discuss the following insights in the context of dating men, but they apply equally to women.

Scroll further down to read about behaviors and situations you are more likely to encounter with men only.

Also realize you are not guaranteed to encounter these issues when you date someone with depression. Whether you ask or deduce it after months of dating, there will be a point when your partner discloses they deal with depression.

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